I have approximately one day until the end of my medical internship / housemanship year. How do I feel about this? Excited, Yes! Happy that I’ll finally be able to get more sleep? Yes!
Rounding up this compulsory one year of my life is one thing I’ve really been looking forward and counting down to. But I can’t shake off the feeling of now what next?
Maybe it’s because I keep getting asked that same question every other day or because every other person I know seems to have it all figured out and are actively taking steps towards their future, which almost all look like this – writing foreign exams to relocate abroad and continue their medical practice.
P.S: IN CASE YOU’RE NEW AROUND HERE AND WONDERING WHAT THIS HOUSEMANSHIP OF A THING IS, I’VE EXPLAINED ALL THAT HERE, TALKED ABOUT GRADUATING MED SCHOOL HERE, MY STRUGGLE TO GET A HOUSEMANSHIP PLACEMENT HEREAND ALSO BLOGGED ABOUT MY FIRST THREE MONTHS OF MY HOUSEMANSHIP IN NIGERIA (LUTH) EXPERIENCE HERE.
If I were to go with the natural flow of things, it would, of course, be NYSC next affording me another year to answer the question of “what next”? but I realize that the future is now. Not later. It’s here now and I need to start defining what I want mine to look like and start taking steps towards it.
The thing is, I’m still figuring that bit out. Does it make me seem unserious to say that I’m still figuring it out? Every colleague I’ve told that usually gives me a funny look. I’m never quite sure how to explain to them that when I think of my ideal life, the life I’d rather live – I don’t really see “Doctor Ikegbune” in it or “IV lines” and “Ward rounds”.
So, while I’m super happy to finally be done with my housemanship year. I’m also a bit scared because I feel like my life is really just starting now. The real adulting starts now, and the thoughts of “what if you fail”, “what if you go broke” keeps coming to me but I’m drenching that in crazy to do lists and outlines of what I want to achieve
I can’t say for sure right now that I’d be retaining the Doctor title but one thing I know for sure is that this new phase of my life definitely means more work for me. More work, More dedication, More consistency and more risk taking.
So, Right now?
I’m focusing on completing the 2018 Cassie Daves blog planner in time for the new year, working on expanding the Cassie Daves brand, expanding my mind – Interning in creative houses, picking up new skills and building my Christian life
I’m also thinking of doing an observership in a foreign hospital for a short period of time. Maybe, just maybe it’s the way Medicine is practiced in this country of mine that makes it so unappealing.
Writing this post reminded me of a similar post I wrote way back in 2013 about uncertainties, what-ifs, and whatnots. It’s crazy how it’s 4 years later and that post still finds my heart in the exact same place and still rings true.
Have you ever found yourself at a cross road as regards your professional life and future? How did you overcome that?
Please share and let’s connect!
P.P.S – Check out other posts in my med diary here.